Monday, January 4, 2010

The Eleventh Doctor!

I am looking forward to Matt Smith's take on the Doctor so much more after seeing this trailer. I dig the third Doctor-esque uppercut. Geronimooooo!!!! More>>

Sunday, December 20, 2009

Sir Terry on Religion.

Terry Pratchett is the funniest man in the world. He may also be one of the smartest. More>>

Saturday, December 19, 2009

Cameron's New Clothes


I'm going to be perfectly blunt: Avatar is not a good movie. It's not necessarily a bad film either, but it's very bland and plays it safe on almost every level. How does a film that cost nearly ten times the amount of District 9 have visuals that pale in comparison? Why do all the characters look like cartoons? Why is there so much out of place cursing? Why is Michelle Rodriguez playing herself yet again?

It's never a good sign when I can't name a single ancillary character's name one day after seeing a movie. The only reason I remember the protagonists name is that it's repeated ad naueseum. My brain is throwing up a 404 error with every concurrent review that I've read. Are these people seeing a different movie than I am? What, besides price, is Cameron revolutionizing in cinema?

I am seriously wondering if we are experiencing a Phantom Menace style mass delusion with this movie. We have convinced ourselves that this movie is so game changing that we see much more than is actually there. I think there is a very strong possibility that in a couple of weeks people will start realizing that this movie is not very good, and start attacking it ala Phantom Menace.

Spoiler Warning !!!

Ok, here's the gist: Jake Sully's brother is killed on the planet of Pandora. Jake is recruited by Evil corp to take his place in the Avatar program. Jake uses his Avatar to interact with the Na'vi while feeding intel to Colonel Scarhead. He is accepted instantly by the aliens while continuing to spy on them for Crazy Colonel. Jake falls in love with female protagonist alien and mates with her to the sound of incredibly cheesy music ripped off from Enya. The humans attack the Na'vi whilst they are cuddling and rips up a magic ancestor tree. Girl alien protagonist finds out that Jake has betrayed them and never wants to see him again. Jake jumps on a flying Deus Ex Machina and is suddenly the leader of the Na'vi. He unites all of the Na'vi tribes in twelve minutes and they mount a defense against the humans who are now gunning for their other magic ancestor tree. There is an epic fight where stuff blows up and alien dino chickens fight fat airplanes and bugocopters. The battle. of course, evolves into a one on one melee with Jake and Colonel Badguy climaxing with Alien girl protagonist perforating Badguy with arrows. The humans are kicked off of Pandora and the magic tree sucks Jake permanently into his Avatar. The end.

I just saved you thirty bucks.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Solomon Kane

Whoa. Where the hell did this come from? I love and devour almost everything Robert Howard has ever done, ditto on Lovecraft. Solomon Kane influenced almost every "dark" hero in some way. This movie looks like it could in fact do him justice. I'm sure it will be better than Arnie's abysmal Conan films which dumbed down the character exponentially. Crossing my fingers on this one. More>>

Best of 09: Top Films

4. Coraline

This is the book that first made Neil Gaiman a household name. American Gods brought in critical acclaim, Sandman won every award possible, but Coraline placed him on countless bookshelves young and old. Why does this book resonate so? I think that Coraline's too busy parents make her quite easy to identify with. Most of us have been in her shoes (or felt like we were) at some point. Gaiman mixes this angst deftly with a classic dark fairytale equal parts scary, funny, and thrilling.

How would all this translate to the screen? Exquisitely. Coraline had a second great visionary attached to it in the person of Henry Selick the stop motion visionary. The colors and movement bring this fairytale to life, and the dark humor translates fantastically to the stop motion medium. The voice work is top notch, specifically Dakota Fanning as Coraline and Keith David as the wuss-puss. Add to this an ethereal faux French soundtrack by Bruno Coulais and you have an absolute classic.

Note: This is one of the best 3d films I have ever seen. Unfortunately the same can not be said of the 3d process at home with the old school red and green glasses. You still get the movie which is quite amazing on its own. More>>

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Shut Up Woman Get On My Horse

This is insane. It will also insert itself into your brain and never let you go.

Sweet Lemonade!!! More>>

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Tron Legacy reveal.


The first released image looks really good, kind of cyberpunky. The helmetless look is pretty interesting, I wonder if they'll don them when in a game? Hit the jump to see the poster.

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